I have some not-great news to share. After my journey with breast cancer in 2019, I thought I was out of the woods. Unfortunately, I have another tumor.
The news isn’t good, but it’s not as bad as it could be. For that I’m very grateful. My lymph nodes look clear, the tumor is small, it’s slow-growing, and not aggressive. But it’s still cancer. It’s in the same breast, close to where the first tumor was, so it was likely there before, but undetected.
If you were with me on the journey last time, you’ll know how much I appreciated the enormous and heartfelt support I received. It made all the difference in the world to me, and was just the medicine I needed. In order to figure out what I thought and felt, I had to write and share about what was happening. This warm and welcoming community was
the perfect place to do that.
This time around, it’s been a much more internal process. My amazing family and my close friends have been the people I needed to talk to, and I haven’t been called to make the news public until now. I’m not sure how I’ll feel going forward, and if I’ll be sharing and writing much or not. I’m taking it day by day.
I’ll be having surgery on April 30th. Fingers crossed, I’m planning for a quick recovery. I still treasure my healing crystals, and I welcome all prayers, support and well-wishes to be sent to me, through them. I’m a sensitive soul, and I need a clearing station for all that
I don’t recommend doing this twice, but I’m finding it to be much easier the second time around. I know the path, or at least the general trajectory, and I’m much less distraught and anxious. I was undone last time. This time, I feel remarkably undaunted.
I’ve been working on lots of exciting projects, including a new website (the image below is from a recent photo shoot.) I have another online class planned for May 31st, and life is generally really good. I joined the local breast cancer dragon boat team before I go the news, and it looks like I will just have to sit out a season before getting started.
If, at some level, cancer is here to teach me what parts of my life need healing, I’ve been a dedicated student. I’ve done a lot of work on myself since this process began, and I feel quite transformed as I meet it this time. Again, I don’t recommend getting cancer, but it has brought me some amazing gifts, most notable being how much more “me” I feel after 18 months of applying myself to its teachings.
My friends, life is nothing but unexpected. Thank you for being part of my world as I navigate this most recent turn. I hope you’re feeling resourced and able to navigate whatever your lives are bringing you.
With much love,
ps. Yes, I’m sitting in my bathtub in the photo, surrounded by the houseplants that have been my pandemic hobby. 🙂